Delight
yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.
– Psalm 37:4
Psalm 37:4
saved my marriage, and because of that we have chosen, as a couple, to cling to
this verse. I was in the middle of an affair.
My world
was falling apart.
My husband
was awaiting my answer? I had spend a week trying to figure out what I wanted.
I had to figure out what was best for me, my heart, my soul and my life. Pretty
selfish huh?
My husband
spent the week at his parent’s house and I stayed at our home. We had only been
married for a short time, less than 2 years. In that 2 years, I fell in love
with another man, a man I was convinced could be described as my soul-mate.
I spent the
week racking my brain over the best choice. In my mind, my choice was made, but
how was I going to break it to my husband that I was going to leave him for
another man. Usually, when I am overwhelmed, I spend as much time cleaning and
reorganizing as possible to help take my mind off the issue.
I was
cleaning the living room, I ran across a wedding gift that Scott and I had
received on our wedding day. It was a set of memory verse cards.
My
affair had pulled me away from Jesus.
I don’t
even remember the last time I had prayed or even cracked open a Bible. But for
some reason, that day, as I moved the cards, I took the time to read this
verse:
“Delight
in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.” – Psalm
37:4
Right then
and there, my heart was softened. I fell to my knees in prayer and had a pretty
intense conversation with God. I cried out to God. What was I doing?
What have I done? I caused all this to happen all because I was
looking for my own desires.
Who am I
to decide what my desires are? I was not delighting in the LORD, I was running in the
opposite direction. I had been running from God, but God was the answer this
whole time.
I was
selfish and living in sin. God put Scott in my life for a reason. God knows my
desires better than I could, and I wanted to know what God’s plan was. Then as
I sat sobbing on the floor, I heard his voice.
God’s voice
called my name,
It was so
great to hear God call my name, it had been so long. I had given up on God. My
sin was too terrible to have God forgive me. But hearing my name reminded me of
His sweet grace. He is a God of second chances.
God you
are right. Who am I to think I could possibly fulfill my own desires by my own
hands. Who am I to question your plan for my life with Scott? God, I know you
placed Scott in my life for a reason. I want to delight in you. I want you to
give me the desires my heart truly needs. God I don’t know how I got to this
place, my life is a mess. My marriage is broken. I’ve lost friends. Help Lord,
what am I supposed to do?”
“Run to
Scott. Run full-speed back to Scott. He will forgive you. He will take you
back.
It is
going to take work, but your marriage will make it.”
Scott and I
have celebrated 11 years of marriage this past June!
I have
fallen so in love with Scott. God was right, and has blessed me with this man
who I am honored to call, Beloved. I made a painting of our verse which hangs
in the living room.
We are
reminded everyday of the amazing love and grace that God has poured over our
life and marriage. When things look like they are not working out, we stop and
make sure that we are delighting in God.
Our desires
often turn selfish in nature, so we pray for God to show us our desires and
passions of our heart. We strive to be like Him daily!
Source:
Unveiledwife
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