Sexuality is a wonderful part of our humanness, yet its
importance in the success of a relationship is often overlooked or simply
avoided. In the months and years leading up to marriage, a couple’s sex life
can be hot and steamy, adding a heady level of passion to the relationship. Over
time, long term damage can result by oversight and neglect. When sex is used to
make war rather than to make love, the effects can be devastating. On a
neurobiological level alone, the body is deprived of the truly positive effects
of several neurochemicals, including the bond-building oxytocin. Instead,
negative sexual war tactics build levels of stress-related neurochemicals, such
as adrenaline and cortisol.
