Seasons of Marriage!

It is a matter of necessity for the various seasons of marriage to come, just as it is with the various seasons of life; it makes for a complete and rounded maturation of the marriage.

 

For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven. Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from beginning to end. (Ecclesiastes 3:1, 11 NLT)

All marriages without exception at one time or the other are bond to move from one season to another. Within the lifetime of a marriage the seasons may repeat itself many times. Within the different seasons a marriage may change from bad to worse. At other times it may change from worse to better. Yet at other times it may change from better to best depending on the ability of the persons involved in the relationship to handle the biblical dynamics of marriage.

Understanding and mastering the biblical dynamics of marriage will go a long way in helping couples in the Holy Matrimony to manage their marriages in order to maximum glory to God and maximum Joy to the Home.

The fact is no marriage has ever been so good that it can never be improved upon.

The following seasons have further been identified in more direct terms:

1) The first love season (moments immediately after wedding)
2) Seasons of parenting/child raising
3) Seasons when the children have grown, gone to school, get married and left the home; now husband and wife are back to being alone again
4) Seasons of old age with its concomitant health challenges
5) Seasons of plenty and of lack respectively
6) Seasons of strength and also of weakness
7) Season when death takes one away and leave the other at old age.

The Bible makes it clear that as long as the earth remains, all these Seasons will never cease to come to pass.

The wisest and best response to all these staggering realities to the seasons of marriage is to commit to learning and applying the dynamics of biblical marriage.

These dynamics are as follows:
1) The dynamics of laying a solid foundation, which is Jesus Christ (Mat 7: 24-28). This will keep the marriage structure from sinking in times of storms, rain, wind and flood.
2) The dynamics of continuous growth in the knowledge of God's pattern of biblical marriage
3) The dynamics of oneness (physical, emotional, spiritual, geographical oneness etc is indispensably crucial for a marriage to victoriously weather the storms) Gen 2:24, Eccl 4:9-12
4) The dynamics of forgiveness

The following nuggets have been tested and proven, and are thus proposed as a counsel. It can be upheld as precautionary rules to help marriages through moments of disagreement:
1) Don't refuse to eat your wife's food when you disagree
2) Don't refuse sex because of disagreement
3) Don't stop sleeping together in the same room
4) Don't starve one another of funds, finance, etc
5) Always pray together regardless of the conflict
6) Do not trade verbal assaults with your spouse; do not abuse each other's parents or families
7) Do not engage in physical assaults
8) Always keep the communication line open
9) Do not report yourselves to the third party: parents, children, etc.
10) Never contemplate divorce (Mal 2:16); Do not separate rooms, children, cars, spoons, food, etc.
11) Never allow the sun go down while you are still angry with your spouse; ensure to resolve your disagreements in earnest

Note: disagreement is normal in marriages due to many reasons among which is gender-based perspective differences. However ensure to deliberately resolve all disagreements according to the injunctions of the word of God, the infallible pattern for an ever enduring godly marriage.

Excerpts from Family Life Summit at The Reconciliation House Ministry, Nigeria.