In some books and seminars, submission is so badly taught that women have been told to obey their husbands, even if they instruct their wives to do something morally wrong.
In the first place, let's consider God's view of human authority in general.
Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves. [Romans 13:1-2]
God has instituted human authority, and it is for our own good. First Peter 2:13 picks up the same theme. It says,
Submit yourselves for the Lord's sake to every authority instituted among men: whether to the king, as the supreme authority, or to governors, who are sent by him to punish those who do wrong and to commend those who do right.
What does this mean? Paul and Peter are both saying that submission to God means submission to God-ordained authority. This means that rebellion against such authority is rebellion against God.
There are four major areas of authority addressed in the Bible—human government, church leadership, employers, and the home.
In thinking this through, I've come to realize that there are biblical exceptions to submission in every area of authority. For instance, with regard to obedience to government, the Egyptian midwives did not obey Pharaoh and kill all the little boy babies—thus Moses was saved and God blessed the midwives. Rahab did not obey her king and turn in the Hebrew spies—she and her family were spared when Jericho was destroyed. Daniel would not pray to an idol or to his king, and he deliberately disobeyed the king's decree. God honoured him for his faithfulness.
As far as employer/employee relations are concerned, we read about three God-fearing young men who were administrators under Nebuchadnezzar, king of Babylon. They would not bow down in worship to his image and laid their lives on the line as a result. And God rescued them from the fiery furnace.
There was also an obscure little man named Obadiah whose story is recorded in 1 Kings 18:9-14. When all the prophets of God were ordered to be killed by Ahab and Jezebel, he protected a hundred of them. He was employed as a servant of the king, and yet he defied his employer's orders.
God once blessed the actions of a son who disobeyed his own father. Saul's son Jonathan was ordered by his father to kill David. Instead he protected David, who was his closest friend.
Clearly, human authority can be abused. And as children of God, we must obey our Father.
We are not free to cop-out on responsibility by doing something wrong because an authority tells us to do it. All human authority is under the umbrella of God's authority, and God's authority must be obeyed first. You can't say "Well, my boss told me to lie and I have to lie because he is my boss," or "I have to do this because my husband told me to." No, you don't have to!
If there is a conflict between God's rules and man's, the believer must choose to obey God. And bear in mind, there may be suffering involved. Of course we know, as 1 Peter 2:19 tells us, if we suffer for doing good, God is pleased with us.
It is interesting to note that a man's prayer life can be blocked if he does not respect or honour his wife. Both partners must keep grace and forgiveness alive in the marriage. When bitterness and resentment are given a place in the home, more is lost than personal warmth and enjoyment. The vital element of the husband's prayer life, through which he receives both guidance and assistance, will be hindered. No couple should attempt to function within the confines of that sort of handicap.
A man should prayerfully take his wife's concerns to heart when making any decision. He should listen to her. He should pray with her. He should seriously consider the consequences she might bear in the wake of his choices. There ought not be too many instances in a good, healthy marriage where a man actually moves in a direction of which his wife disapproves. I heard one of my professors say, "Men, if your wife doesn't agree with a major decision, don't do it. Ask God to bring her into agreement if it's His will."
We are on the safe side when we see the definition of subjection in the person of Jesus himself. He, being equal with the Father, relinquished that equality to become the servant of us all. . . . Every Christian is called to servanthood as the expression of his or her new life in Christ. Servanthood is the identifying mark of every true Christian believer. A servant's role is to make sure that the other person's needs are met. Servanthood is an act of strength, not weakness.
Source: Bible.org
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